I’ve lost my identity after I became a Mom…My life doesn’t exist its all about kids…

Let’s talk about Identity crises, independent women face after kids.

When I came to know about my second pregnancy I was really happy as I always wanted to have two kids. But there was a fear in my heart- fear to sit at home again, fear of same diaper life. In that very moment I felt that my life, my identity doesn’t exist. I am done and so is my life.

I’ve let go of many things that I used to enjoy before kids. Now, less travel, fewer outings, fewer friends date, fewer movies and couple life is almost zero. Please dont take me wrong, I love my kids and I enjoy being a mom to my little ducks. But the transition from an independent woman to a mom, the transition from who I used to be TO who I am now made me question myself- Am I happy with new responsibilities and the mothering stuff??

If I calculate then 80% of my life has changed and the struggle to catch up with myself over coffee looks difficult but not impossible. My heart took a deep session with my mind and I promised myself that I will take care of my thoughts and moods. It’s time to live life with change.

On that note, I made a few changes which helped me a lot and I think they will motivate you as well.

Pamper Yourself –

Take a shower daily and on time. Shop whether your size has changed from S to XL.  If you love shoes then get two pairs instead of one. Dont neglect the things that used to make you happy.

Hang out with friends –

I know its difficult with kids but most of the time it’s our laziness which makes us say NO for outings. Dont plan for a movie as you’ll be frustrated to the hell. Plan a date in a kid’s friendly area. Sit and Sip your favorite drink with favorite buddy.

Stop Comparing –

Comparing your life with others or with your past is your biggest drawback as it brings the feeling of discontent. Try to focus on your life and your present.

Explore your interest –

Let it be writing, crafting, stitching, painting, reading – just give a thought and explore your interest. Things you used to love and make time for it. Motherhood is filled with responsibility but still, your passion can make you achieve heights.

Me Time –

Me time is really important to be content. Ask for a help from a family member, caretaker or husband and spend at least an hour alone. This alone time will help you gain the lost energy.

Remember  You need to accept that you will never have a life as it was before kids but this doesn’t mean that you have lost your identity. It’s just a phase.

 

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